Globetrotter Postcards: December 2006

30 December 2006

Seeing double.

Hearing: Traffic.

Happy Eid everyone!!

So I'm just here, in bed, tossing up between watching a movie before going to bed or getting an 'early' (its 10.20pm) night since i have a flight tomorrow. I will be going to Khartoum, which unfortunately is a turnaround meaning its going to be a very long day and i wont land till 11.30pm and then wont get home till well after midnight *sigh*. And do you want to know what i have on the 1st? Khartoum again!! Everyone who i tell this laughs and says exactly the same thing "who did you piss off at crew control??" and the truth is no one! I haven't called in sick, haven't hassled them for swaps or anything! Dem's the breaks i guess and i just gotta deal with it.

So everyone, party up for me too for New Years tomorrow - may 2007 bring you health, success, happiness, and love - Have a brilliant New Year!

VP

Flying 101

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to VPs flying 101. If you are sitting at the back please leave the spitballs till after class and pay close attention. We will be covering safety, security, patience, politeness and above all common sense and courtesy. And I'm not just talking to you passengers today, some of you crew can also learn a thing or two. Oh and if you don't like it you don't have to be here, kapeesh?

(These are my own rules from my experiences onboard with crew and passengers, each one is based on an experience and will have the supporting post linked to it. Please don't copy without permission - linking is welcome, VP.)

Welcome to Flying 101

26 dec 06

1- DON'T just sit wherever you like, ask the crew first.

2- DO sit where your boarding card says your seat is especially if its a short or full flight, if your travelling with your family but are sitting separately just deal with it.

3- DON'T check in late and then complain that your family isn't sitting together.

21 jan 07

4- DON'T be impatient and inconsiderate if there is a medical situation you can see the crew are dealing with. They will get to your tea/coffee whatever when they can, a persons life has a higher priority.

5- DO tell crew if you have a medical problem or if during the flight you start to feel sick. Trust me we want to know and prevention is waaaay better than having you collapse or become seriously ill.

19 apr 07

6- DO wear shoes whenever you use the lavatory. They are not clean even if they look it.

7- DO try as much as possible to stay within your seat and not to stretch out into the aisle unless your ready for a few bumps and bruises.

26 apr 07

8- DO keep your seatbelts fastened loosly, make sure we can see them, put them over your blanket. We dont like waking you when we're going through turbulance to make sure you have them on.

9- DONT touch the bread. Its gross. (First and Business class specific)

10- DONT complain that you didnt get your meal. Catering only gives us a set amount. Check in early and sit at the front or, when you book specify a meal.

11- DO get out of your seat to go to the galley (not during a service though!) if you want something.

Why boarding takes longer than the flying time...

Hearing: Hanging by a moment - Lifehouse

Ive decided to start a list of Flying Tips for passengers. A sort of what not to do when you get onboard and what you should do. I'll keep adding as i come across them while flying and post updates when i add to this list.

Last night i had a short turnaround. On the return sector the flight time was 40mins and it was full. One father was separated from his family and asked if he could sit next to them, i told him the flight was full but would see once everyone was onboard if i could swap him. But he asked me again even though he could see we were still boarding, and i gave him a "be patient" reply. Now everyone seated next to his wife was travelling together and they weren't likely to split (why should they?) so i went back and apologised - but come on, its only 40mins! We'll barely take off before we start landing again.

There was a bunch of individuals who also seemed to want to sit wherever they liked which didn't help since we had to go up and ask where they were really sitting ask them to move thereby slowing the process of boarding and of course taking off later. And in case your wondering why we don't just seat the other person where your seat is, its because if we had to do that to everyone it would take forever. One couple did just that, took seats that weren't theirs and kept having to move, in the end i told them off in front of everyone explaining that it delayed boarding was inconsiderate and unfair and they should not do it without asking the crew. If the flight isn't full thats a different story but even then you need to wait till boarding is done.

The thing is if you have a particular seat you want or you want to sit with your family - check in early. The "i told the check in staff i wanted __ but they didn't give it to me", or "they said i could change on board" excuses don't work. Ive seen it a hundred times. A family checks in late and are given separate seats, they board late and then argue with crew and the cabin manager wanting to sit together disrupting other passengers and again delaying the flight.

So with that in mind the first VP rules of flying are now online.

VP

Airline unifroms quiz

Hearing: Come closer -Tarkan

I only scored a 7/10 on this - shame i know, but fun. Tray i know you'll get all of them right.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/6211298.stm

Thanks Guido for emailing it to me.

VP

Landing at Christmas

Hearing: Traffic and Sie Liegt in mienen - Muhabbet (dont know what it means but i really like it)

12.05am 25th December, Christmas Day, where am i? Landing into the sandpit airport. After a very short turnaround flight I'm back home and just had to stop by blogger and wish everyone a wonderful Christmas. May you be lucky enough to spend it with those you love.

VP

Glu wine, antlers and red hats.

Hearing: German Music (MTV)

7.18am Munich.

Morning. Thought I'd drop in and say hello before my flight back to the sandpit today. This layover has been short but fun. The whole crew - every last one - which is unusual went out together. Yesterday, after meeting for drinks at the CMs room, we walked around the village of Landshut. We checked out the Christmas markets, had dinner, (they) drank loads of Glu Wine and froze our butts off!!!

Did i mention we did all of it wearing silly Christmas hats? No? Well allow me to put it this way...while we were taking photos of the village/markets/each other, the locals were taking photos of US!!! LMAO!!!

It was great fun. For once we were the loud bunch having people stare as we walked by or look out their windows wondering what was going on instead of it usually being the other way round! Anyways, enjoy the photos, I'm off to get ready.

VP

How cool is this? They have outdoor heaters, and blankets to keep you warm!

Yes ladies and gents, thats was me wearing a dorky red hat - have your laugh, go on.

Desert Safari

Hearing: Irreplaceable - Beyonce

Yesterday my flatmate E, her father and I went on a half day desert safari. It was great fun dune bashing, (though difficult to take pictures) running around the desert and my fav, sitting around the fire, after dinner, the camp lights switched off so it was pitch black and feeling as if you were surrounded by stars.

Hold on and don't look down!